Fill Your Well First.

Time To Read: 3 mins

 

Recent business studies show that leaders who care are more effective.

If you lead with purpose and express your care, then you’ll get better results these studies claim. It stands to reason people would prefer to work and may work harder for someone who truly cares about their well being compared to someone who doesn’t.

Mud Crack. I wonder though whether these leaders are extending the same kindness to themselves? A giver who continues to give and give, and save none for herself might find her wellspring of love has turned into a mud crack where resentment may stake a claim. If you’re a mother, you know what I’m talking about.

Can these leaders lead others effectively if they aren’t taking care of themselves first? I don’t think so. At least, not for long.

Alignment. Humans are pretty hard wired to notice when something is out of alignment. If you are unable to accept the kind of care and empathy you extend to others, your offer may come across as hollow. The saying, “Do as I say not as I do,” doesn’t work well in leadership.

As leaders, we are being observed for the meaning and intentions of our actions.

Do our actions comport with our beliefs? Are we living our values? Are we walking the talk? Underlying these concerns is the question of whether we can be trusted. Do we really mean what we say?

These answers matter.

Fill Your Well First. If giving is the foundation of leadership, then we must begin with ourselves first.

Loving ourselves allows us to extend that love to others.

When our well is dry, we will find it difficult to act unselfishly.

When we haven’t put aside time to reflect and discover what is lovable within us, we will over-cherish our time and not give wholeheartedly.

When we aren’t practiced in holding space for the wonder of our lives, we will find it difficult to extend the same to others.

Let’s not forget to love ourselves so that we may give love. Let’s not forget to support our own dreams so that we have the capacity to give support to others.

We must believe in ourselves to give someone else courage. We must lead ourselves forward on that road where you hope others will follow.

This is what authenticity looks like.

I want to show myself love. I want to have enough reserves to offer the gift of love generously to others. And, I wish that for you.

What have you been telling others to do, but can’t do for yourself? What ways can you love yourself more? Can you create the space to hold the wonder of yourself?

 

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